Not that I can relate. I don’t tend to judge myself by what I own, or else my self-esteem would be even lower than it is. It’s not that I think there’s anything innately unethical with wanting to be rich or to live in luxury, but it’s obviously never been a priority of mine, or else I would have kept my mouth shut and pretended I really wanted to be a member of society. I don’t think this makes me better than most people, only different. So speaking as someone who is perhaps congenitally tone-deaf and color-blind to this thing called “greed,” perhaps I can accurately assess the situation as an outsider.

No one’s forcing these slovenly idiot hairballs to club one another over the heads for flat-screen TVs. I’ve been exposed to the supposedly irresistible allure of capitalist advertising for five decades now, yet it never compelled me to knee someone in the groin for a cheaper iPad. If any of these baseball-cap-wearing ass-sores clawing over one another at midnight to score a discounted toaster oven using their nearly tapped-out credit card had the slightest chance to be a despised villainous oligarch, they’d cannibalize every peasant within a hundred miles and then go out for lobster puffs with champagne. This isn’t to say that greed is inherently good, only to point out that it’s not confined to those who’ve been successful at it. Much of this recent robotic class-war fist-pumping can be summarized with the popular ghetto term “player-hating.”